a moment of choice
Nothing proves more powerful than the communication we choose to have with ourselves. Our internal conversation generates our attitudes toward specific situations and our lives as a whole. If we choose to ignore our thoughts by being unconscious of them, we experience feelings of helplessness that lead to worrying, shutting down or getting angry. When we make the decision to be aware and in control of our thinking we can be responsible, joyful and free to live life.
When something happens in our life, our thoughts and self talk generate our response. Having negative, defeatist conversations internally results in reactions to events as they happen. We let them effect us rather than causing something favorable to happen next. At Rapport we call this being “In Effect.” We go into “Effect” when we pay little or no attention to our thoughts; our emotions go on automatic and impact our attitude and behavior. The opposite, being “At Cause,” happens when we consciously choose our thoughts, move in a positive direction and take responsibility for life.
As leaders we must be responsible for our thoughts because our thoughts change our world. Leaders offer solutions even in uncomfortable and challenging situations: losing a job, our car breaking down or having a family crisis, the thoughts we allow to come into our mind create emotions and behaviors that lead to our results. In life, situations may hurt us, confuse us, and even challenge our beliefs. We cannot change that; however, we can choose to look at a situation in a way that helps us to better understand our world. We can ask ourselves what we have learned from the experience, or how overcoming this will make me a better person. As Viktor Frankl, holocaust survivor and author of this month’s featured book Man’s Search for Meaning explains, “The one thing you can’t take away from me is the way I choose to respond to what you do to me. The last of one’s freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstance.”
Before we can fully take control of our thoughts we must take responsibility for our own learning, growth and attitude. We have to know that no one on earth has the power to control these things other than ourselves. Comments like, “He made me angry!” or “It’s her fault everything got messed up today” become unacceptable. Instead we make the choice to take ownership of our lives - the successes, the failures and the learning.
How many times a day do you ask yourself, “What purpose did that thought serve?” How often do you check in with your internal monologue to ensure that everything you think benefits you? Imagine what will happen when you vigilantly inspect your thoughts for their intention. How affective will you be when you eliminate those thoughts that harm you and hinder your goals? Rapport’s Process of the Month for November gives you the opportunity to “Walk At Cause.” Use this process as an opportunity to change your focus, improve your awareness and attract positive outcomes in your life.
